Sean O’Connor, Photo Editor


» When people fall off their longboard: I may catch some flak for this one because I myself occasionally longboard, but let’s be real; that shit is fucking hilarious. Slapstick physical comedy arising from incidents, accidents and mishaps is and has been funny for centuries (why do you think America’s Funniest Home Videos has been renewed for it’s astounding 22nd season, which premiered last Monday and rocked my world?) Shit, Moe and Larry beat Curly into a stroke back in the ol’ Vaudeville days, all in the name of comedy! But the point is, when we as a collective people see a longboarding desperado cruising across the quad, we incessantly hope their dumb fucking wheel gets caught in a pebble and they land on their stupid face. Because it’s funny. Sorry, longboard community. We’re a bunch of assholes.

» Sundays on South Quad in autumn: Guess what season it is — fucking fall. There’s a nip in the air, and my house is full of mutant squash. But the best part of this freaky-assed harvest is the ol’ chums who play Cricket, “The Gentleman’s Game,” on South Quad. They don’t go out for one or two games — THEY PLAY ALL FUCKING DAY. Seriously, it’s some junior high schoolyard shit. The best part of watching them play is not knowing what to expect. What I mean by that is… I don’t know anything about Cricket. I have a better grasp of Quidditch than I do of Cricket. Yet I say, bowl on my batsmen and wicker-keepers! Your sport is to my utmost enjoyment in passing-by.

Drew Hatcher, Copy Chief


» Grandparents not laughing at my jokes: My grandparents came for a visit last weekend. I don’t see them very often, so there was that initial awkwardness where we were reconnecting. And then there was the prolonged awkwardness where none of my jokes were well-received for the entire visit. They heard me, but they just kept giving me these sad glances. Come on, Gramps and Gramma! I’m giving you gold! Don’t pretend you’ve never had a hangover or promiscuous sex before! My grandparents don’t like me.

» Breaking Bad season finale: Every Sunday night for the past few months, my friends and I have huddled in front of the television at 9 o’clock for a steamy Break and Bake (lol cookies, amirite?). The show is of such amazing quality that it is literally the highlight of my week. This Sunday marks the season finale. I will miss you so, so much. Also, I’d like to point out that AMC is the greatest network on television, bar none. Fuck premium cable.

About The Author

Related Posts